In-laws Article: Holidays Marriage

November 10, 2009, 1:27 pm     2 Comments »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine.

Holidays with the In-laws:  Tips for Resolving Marital Conflict
By Jenna D. Barry

Do you and your spouse always agree about where and with whom to spend the holidays?  If not, then you certainly aren’t alone; this is a major source of tension for many couples.  What should you do if you want to spend Christmas at your parents’ house, but your spouse wants to spend it with his/her family?  The answer to that is a tricky one, but here are a few tips to help you achieve a win-win situation.
(Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Difficult in-laws

September 30, 2009, 2:06 pm     2 Comments »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine.

Got Scary In-laws?
by Jenna D. Barry

It’s that time of year when children– dressed as little witches or monsters– trot through neighborhoods gathering huge piles of delicious candy. I have fond childhood memories of Halloween, even though it can be somewhat of a frightening holiday for kids. Now that I’m an adult, what scares me is the high divorce rate. Difficult in-laws are one of the top reasons the divorce rate is so high; if you have in-law problems, then you probably have marriage problems.

In-laws are often stereotyped unfairly. Many, if not most, married couples have wonderful in-laws who treat them with kindness and respect. However, as indicated by countless posts from wives in my support group, it is not uncommon for in-laws to have such destructive behavior that it poses a real threat to marriages.

(Read the rest.)


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Mother-in-Law Whisperer

August 23, 2009, 6:17 pm     8 Comments »

This article appears in SheJustGotMarried.com, SmartWoman.com, Chic Mom Magazine, GirlGetStrong.com, Metroplex Baby, etc.

5 Ways to Become a Mother-in-Law Whisperer
By Jenna D. Barry

I’m a huge fan of the show “Dog Whisperer” with Cesar Millan; it’s not unusual for me to sit and watch four episodes in a row. Recently, during one of my Dog Whisperer TV marathons, I realized that many of the techniques Cesar uses to train dog owners can also be used to train daughters-in-law. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Toxic in-laws

August 18, 2009, 11:53 am     1 Comment »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine:

5 Ways to Protect Your Marriage From Toxic In-laws

by Jenna D. Barry

Is it possible to have a great marriage even though you have difficult in-laws? Yes, in the same way that it’s possible to have a beautiful yard even if you have a few weeds. If you are considering divorce because you don’t like your in-laws, that’s like selling your house because there are some dandelions in the lawn. Here are five ways to have a strong marriage in the face of controlling, manipulative and/or intrusive in-laws. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Financial Independence

July 29, 2009, 9:58 am     2 Comments »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine.

5 Ways To Become Financially Independent From Parents And In-laws
by Jenna D. Barry

Do you live with your parents or in-laws? Do you work for them? Do you owe them money? Do they provide daycare for your children? Do you depend on them for transportation? (Read the rest.)


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Be Respectfully Confident W/ MIL

June 18, 2009, 11:47 am     3 Comments »

This article appears in Power Women Magazine, WomenOf.com, AssociatedContent.com, Helium.com, EzineArticles.com, etc.

How To Be Respectfully Confident With Your Mother-in-Law
By Jenna D. Barry

According to Kermit the Frog, it ain’t easy being green.  Well, sometimes it ain’t easy being a daughter-in-law either.  Many wives have come to me for advice on how to deal with their mother-in-law.  I always tell them the same thing:  behave as a mature adult by communicating your needs and setting boundaries.  Some take my advice, while others don’t because they think that being assertive with their in-laws is equivalent to being disrespectful to their elders.
(Read the rest.)


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Article for New Parents

May 18, 2009, 4:41 pm     1 Comment »

This article appears in SunSentinel.com, Stork.Net, AssociatedContent.com, Helium.com, EzineArticles.com, etc.

Do Your In-laws Drive You Crazy?  Coping Tips For New Parents
By Jenna D. Barry

“My in-laws want to see my kids constantly.  They drop by the house unexpectedly and stay for long visits.  They offer unwanted advice about everything from breast pumps to hemorrhoids.”

Can you relate to those statements?  If so, then how do you usually respond when your in-laws say or do something you don’t like?  Do you gossip about them to your spouse, parents, siblings, and friends?  Do you hold grudges against them?  Do you demand that your mate tell his or her parents to jump off a cliff?  If so, then it’s time to tweak your behavior a bit so you can start getting your needs met.
(Read the rest.)


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Dealing With Future Mother-in-Law

May 15, 2009, 12:30 am     6 Comments »

This article appears on WeddingApproved.com, WeddingLuxe.blogspot.com, TheWeddingBelles.ca, WeddingIdeas2, Associated.com, Helium.com, EzineArticles.com, etc.

How To Be Assertive With Your Future Mother-in-Law
by Jenna D. Barry

The way you interact with your future mother-in-law now will set a precedent for how she will treat you after you are married, so it’s important that you start behaving as an adult on an equal level to her. If she says or does something that gets on your nerves, don’t get your hoop slip in a wad. Just talk to her in a calm and mature manner. What you say is important, but how you say it is even more important. Treat your mother-in-law the same way you’d want your fiancé to treat your mom. You can be firm if necessary, but remember to be tactful so you can make progress toward gaining your future husband’s loyalty and respect. (Read the rest.)


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Wanna follow Jenna on Twitter?

May 13, 2009, 12:11 am     No Comments »

Follow Jenna on Twitter by visiting http://twitter.com/JennaDBarry or clicking on this image:
twitter Pictures, Images and Photos


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In-laws Article: Gossip

May 4, 2009, 6:24 pm     3 Comments »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine:

In-laws: Protecting Your Marriage From Gossip

Gossip can be a major threat to a marriage, especially when (1) a mother gossips to her son about his wife and (2) a wife gossips to her family about her husband. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Compromise with spouse

, 6:07 pm     6 Comments »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine:

In-laws: Six Ways to Reach Loving Compromises With Your Spouse
by Jenna D. Barry

Many married couples argue about their in-laws. The good news is that you can have a terrific marriage even if you have difficult in-laws. The best way to overcome any challenge in marriage is to unite as a couple, and the best way to unite as a couple is to reach loving compromises. (Read the rest.)


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Got Mother-in-Law Problems?

, 6:04 pm     6 Comments »

This article is in Power Woman Magazine, WomenOfFlorida.com, Essential Baby AU, NJFamily.com, EasierParenting.com, Swell Pregnancy Guide, Thrifty Moms, Helium.com, EzineArticles.com, and AssociatedContent.com, etc.

Got Mother-In-Law Problems? 5 Tips for Bringing Out the Best in Your Mother-in-Law
By Jenna D. Barry

If you get along great with your mother-in-law, then I’m really happy for you. Actually, if I’m being honest, I’m only 60% happy for you and 40% jealous. There are a lot of women who love their husband’s mother because she is kind, considerate, and unassuming. Unfortunately there are many of us with controlling mothers-in-law who believe the world –and everyone in it– should revolve around them.
(Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Make Spouse Priority

April 16, 2009, 8:02 am     1 Comment »

The following article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine.


Difficult Choices:  Making Your Spouse a Priority Over Your Parents
by Jenna D. Barry

You have probably heard the phrase “leave and cleave.”  Most of us agree that the cleaving part is pretty fun, but the process of leaving often presents a challenge.  Becoming truly independent from our parents is one of the best gifts we can give our spouse.  That doesn’t mean we should cut off contact with our parents or start being hateful toward them.  It just means that pleasing our spouse should take priority over pleasing our parents. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Drawing Boundaries

March 17, 2009, 2:45 pm     1 Comment »

Check out this article published in Hitched Magazine in February. (This article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine.)

Drawing Boundaries With Difficult In-laws
By Jenna D. Barry

Can you relate to this statement?

“My in-laws call constantly, drop by unexpectedly, criticize the way we raise our kids, and manipulate us with guilt if we don’t do exactly what they think we should. They often put my husband in a position to choose between being a great spouse and an obedient son.”

Most experts agree that the best way to handle destructive in-laws is to draw boundaries with them. The question is who should be the one to draw those boundaries. Some say that if the husband’s parents are the problem, then he– rather than his wife– should confront them so they are less likely to get their feelings hurt. Likewise, if the wife’s parents are the problem, then she should deal with them directly. That’s terrific advice in a perfect world. The problem is– yes, you guessed it– we don’t live in a perfect world. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws Article: Hitched/December

January 7, 2009, 12:27 am     No Comments »

The following article was published in Hitched Magazine in December of 2008. (This article is exclusive to Hitched Magazine.)

5 Tips for Being a Great Spouse During The Holidays
By Jenna D. Barry

It’s no surprise that the holiday season can be a stressful time of year. Not only do we have the usual responsibilities—such as our jobs, childcare, and household chores—but we have to squeeze in time for all of that holiday cheer. That’s right, I’m talking about stringing Christmas lights, decorating the tree, baking cookies, buying presents, writing Christmas cards, and spending time with friends and family. Although most of these activities are meant to spread joy, we often find ourselves too busy and exhausted to enjoy them. That’s why it’s especially important this time of year to provide strength and support for each other. (Read the rest.)


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Excerpt from Hitched Magazine

, 12:19 am     3 Comments »

Hitched Magazine, January 17, 2009

Jenna D. Barry’s new book titled, A Wife’s Guide to In-laws: How to Gain Your Husband’s Loyalty Without Killing His Parents gives tips on how to have a great marriage—even if your in-laws aren’t so great.

Excerpt taken from Chapter 7: Stop Making That Face or It Will Get Stuck That Way: Exposing your husband’s false beliefs

According to some guy on the internet, the second Law of Gun Safety is: Never Point a Gun at Something You’re Not Prepared to Destroy! In the past you have probably directed your anger toward your husband and his parents whenever they behaved like jerks. But that hasn’t done you any good, has it? That’s because you’re wasting your energy on yelling at your hubby and criticizing his folks when it would be better to focus on destroying the false beliefs causing the problems. This chapter will (1) teach you which false beliefs contribute to your husband’s specific behaviors and (2) suggest things you can say/do so your husband will begin to question them. The next time your husband behaves in a way that makes you want to rip your entire wedding finger off, ask yourself what is causing him to behave that way. Once your husband is free from his prison of warped thinking, he will begin to transform from a guilt-ridden parent-pleaser into a confident, independent adult. It’s impossible for me to list all of the false beliefs that contribute to your husband’s behavior, but here are seven major ones:
(Read the rest.)


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Book Excerpt on WomenOf.com

, 12:13 am     No Comments »

The following excerpt was published on WomenOf.com on January 06, 2009.

A Wife’s Guide to In-laws: How to Gain Your Husband’s Loyalty Without Killing His Parents
by Jenna Barry

Jenna D. Barry, a wife of 14 years, has personally experienced the despair that comes from having an unsupportive partner. Her book suggests specific things to say and do to gain your husband’s loyalty and unite as a couple to deal with difficult in-laws. A Wife’s Guide to In-laws has over 40 cartoons, two fun chapters written just for Hubby, and worksheets to help the two of you reach loving compromises about common problem issues. Jenna offers hilarious, heartfelt advice about how to have a great marriage even if your in-laws aren’t so great. Here’s an excerpt from her book.

(Read the rest.)


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Are You Married to a Momma’s Boy?

December 16, 2008, 1:37 am     2 Comments »

This article is currently featured in www.TheNest.com, Families On-Line Magazine, WomenOf.com, EzineArticles.com, AssociatedContent.com, and Helium.com.

“Are You Married to a Momma’s Boy?”
by Jenna D. Barry

You probably fell in love with your husband because he was a loving, generous, thoughtful, responsible, honest person. Maybe you loved the kind way he treated his 5-year old niece, his yellow Labrador retriever, or his sweet little grandma. Whatever qualities attracted you to him, there’s a good chance that his mother is a big reason why he turned out so great. Moms are usually a wonderful influence in their son’s life. Guys who have a close relationship with their mother usually make great husbands.

Unfortunately, sometimes a man has such a close relationship with Mom that it interferes with his ability to be a great husband. When you first dated your husband, you may have admired the fact that he really enjoyed being around his mom. You probably really liked her, and she liked you too. But then maybe she had a hard time letting go of her son, which is understandable since she has known him since he wore Huggies. Perhaps she became a little bit jealous of you, and then you began to feel the need to compete with her. (Read the rest.)


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Are You Dating a Momma’s Boy?

December 15, 2008, 4:40 pm     5 Comments »

This article is featured on E-how.com

“How to Tell if You Are Dating A Momma’s Boy”
by Jenna D. Barry

NBC has a new TV show called “Momma’s Boys.” With Ryan Seacrest as the host, three young men will let their mothers choose their ideal woman. The point of the show—according to NBC’s website—is to ask, “Who really is the most important woman in a man’s life?” (Read the rest.)


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Holidays With In-laws

December 9, 2008, 1:43 pm     1 Comment »

The following article was featured in ForeverBrides.com, Pregnancy.org, and WomenOf.com.

“Six Tips For Spending the Holidays With Your In-laws”
by Jenna D. Barry

The way I see it, there are two groups of people: those who love the holidays because they love spending time with family, and those who dread the holidays because their family—or spouse’s family—is difficult to be around. I wrote this article for those of you in the second category. (Read the rest.)


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Loyal Husband; Difficult In-laws

, 1:32 pm     No Comments »

This article has been featured in MarriedRomance.com, ExploringWomanhood.com, ForeverBrides.com, and Helium.com.

“Everybody Loves Raymond but Hates his Parents”
by Jenna D. Barry

Why does everyone love Raymond? I’d like to smack him upside the head.

To set the record straight, I love the TV show “Everybody Loves Raymond” (because I can relate to it) and I’ll bet that in real life Ray Romano is a wonderful, loyal husband and confident adult. But his character on the show is a gutless wimp who constantly ignores his wife’s needs in order to please his narcissistic parents. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws: Growing a Strong Marriage

, 1:25 pm     2 Comments »

This article is exclusive to About.com.

“Growing a Strong Marriage: Tips for Dealing with In-laws”
by Jenna D. Barry

Last spring I was trying to decide what to do about some green grass that had crept into my flower garden. To pull out the grass or not to pull out the grass…that was the question. I thought to myself, grass isn’t really a weed, but I don’t want it to grow where it is growing. Just then my husband walked up and made the profound statement “A weed is anything that grows where you don’t want it to grow.” I decided that he was a genius and pulled the grass out from around the flowers. Then to prevent the same problem from occurring again, I put in some decorative rocks to serve as a boundary between the flowers and the grass. (Read the rest.)


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In-laws: Advice for Brides

, 1:10 pm     3 Comments »

This article has been featured in WomenOfColorado.com, WomenOfMaryland.com, ForeverBrides.com, and Helium.com.

“Until In-laws Do Us Part: Advice for the Bride-To-Be”
By Jenna D. Barry

Wedding planning tends to bring out the worst in people. That’s a widely known fact…ask any married person.

It’s partly because there are approximately 9,463 decisions to be made while planning a typical medium-sized wedding. Take the cake, for example. Which baker will you use? Which flavor should the cake be? How many layers should it have? How should it be shaped? What should the little statues look like on top?

(Read the rest.)


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Your kids: Dealing w/ In-laws

December 5, 2008, 11:02 am     1 Comment »

This article has been featured in MOM Magazine, Families On-line Magazine, CanadianParents.com, MommyHelp.com, Chic Mom Magazine, Essential Baby AU, EasierParenting.com, MomAndBabyPages.com, etc.

“Whose Baby is it Anyway? Dealing with Intrusive In-laws”
by Jenna D. Barry

If you thought your in-laws were intrusive before you had kids, then hold onto your maternity pants. The “fun” has just begun. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the truth is that your relationship with your in-laws is likely to grow more tense once children enter the picture.
(Read the rest.)


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Are You Living With Your In-laws?

December 3, 2008, 5:17 pm     No Comments »

“Are you Living With Your In-laws?”
By Jenna D. Barry

Do you live with your in-laws? If so, you aren’t alone. People live with their in-laws for several reasons. Newlyweds often do it to save money for a house. New moms (and/or single parents) do it so they can have help with childcare. Sometimes elderly parents move in with a son or daughter when they can no longer take care of themselves. And during poor economic times, some families move in together to survive financial hardship.

(Read the rest.)


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Buy the book!

You can have a GREAT marriage, even if your in-laws aren't so great!

Click here to buy the print version!

Click here to buy the e-book!

You may be quick to blame your in-laws for your marriage problems, but in reality the biggest part of the problem isn't your in-laws, it's your husband's loyalty to them.  When a man marries, he is supposed to transfer his loyalty from his parents to his wife. His behavior plays a key role in how well you get along with his parents.  The goal of this book is to help you gain your husband's loyalty.

If you are in need of hope and encouragement, this book is for you!  Jenna Barry offers hilarious, heartfelt advice about how to have a terrific marriage in spite of difficult in-laws.  As a wife who has personally experienced the despair that comes from having an unsupportive partner, she suggests specific things to say and do to gain your husband's loyalty.  This book won't teach you how to become best friends with your in-laws, but it will teach you how to think and behave in a new way so they no longer have any power over you.  A Wife's Guide to In-laws has over 40 cartoons, two fun chapters written just for your hubby, and worksheets to help the two of you reach loving compromises about common problem issues.

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About Jenna

As a wife of 22 years, Jenna D. Barry (a pen name) has learned how to gain her husband's loyalty through communication, persistence, and a whole lot of love.  She has familiarized herself with the needs and frustrations of other wives by participating in on-line in-law support groups and by talking to marriage therapists, friends, family, and co-workers.

 

Jenna is the author of the book, A Wife's Guide to In-laws:  How to Gain Your Husband's Loyalty Without Killing His Parents. She has been a radio guest on The Mike Bullard Show and her articles have been published in newspapers, websites, and magazines worldwide.  She writes monthly articles for Hitched Magazine and has been quoted in The Washington Times, CNN.com, The London Free Press, TheBump.com, etc. She leads a support group for daughters-in-law right here.


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